Improved Parachute Pants

If I would have saved all my clothes from junior high and high school (the ones that would still fit), I'd be thousands of dollars richer because I wouldn't have to buy the same damn stuff over and over again.

I swear to God, I am wearing parachute pants right now. They're kinda nylonish and they have more pockets than I need and they're noisy when I move. They're slightly softer than I remember, and they have a snap tab thingie to hold up the rolls at the bottom, but other than that I am pretty sure they are freaking parachute pants.

I'll wear these reinvented trendy parachute pants. But I draw the line at gauchos.

Mononucleosis

I've been really tired lately. The ex-hsbf had/has? mono. If he gave it to me, I'm going to beat him to death with his own shoe as soon as I get my energy back.

Maybe it's just the Latin wearing me out.

Or I'm not ingesting enough caffeine. Hard to believe.

Anyway, what's new with you? You need to e-mail your cell phone numbers if you want to be harassed...I can't drunk-dial you if I don't know what to dial, Victor. First home football game this weekend, so the likelihood of drunkenness is high. The likelihood of drunkenfallingasleepexhaustedbefore9p.m. is also high.

Looking Ahead

What could a lab about dinosaurs possibly entail?

I think I must take that class in the future...even if I don't get to paw dinosaur bones.
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One of my instructors is insane. He sends us e-mails before our morning class and expects everyone to read them. Hello, most of these kids wake up 5 minutes before they walk in the classroom. I usually get up early enough to read my e-mails, but I'm checking my personal e-mail rather than my school e-mail...then I lose track of time and end up running out the door.
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I've been freezing my tarsal naviculars off the last two days. Yesterday it was rainy, which seemed like a good opportunity to wash off my black sandals. They were still dirty from when I went on vacation. I didn't realize it was never going to stop raining and never warm up yesterday, though, so by my second class I was over the whole jumping in puddles thing--plus I was soaked to the bone.

That was all just my excuse to say "tarsal naviculars".

Latina Est Non Gaudium

Or something similar.

I try to be a good student sometimes. Really, I do. I buy all the extra Latin help materials, I install the drills onto my computer.

But the vocabulary drills aren't very helpful when they test vocab from the whole book instead of by chapter. WTF?! I have done 2 chapters. Not 40.

The form drills are okay, I can choose part of speech, tense, person, number, etc. That one is working with me. The vocab? Not so much. Back to the flashcards.

Le sigh.

Inappropriate

Professor, encouraging us to practice our homework exercises: "Choose the long runway. Don't go down the short runway, or you'll crash and burn."

Nice.

Apologies

Sorry if you were harassed by me via cell phone last night. There were some text messages, there were some phone calls.

Apparently cherry vodka makes me want to share my drunkenness with the world...but at least most of you weren't subjected to the "Ur a towel!" text message followed by half an hour of hysterical laughing about it while I supposedly couldn't stop laughing long enough to explain what the text message was about.

At least, I hope most of you weren't.

Reason 839 Boys Suck

Back in the day, I would actually chat on AOL and meet people (i.e., guys) that way. Then I was cured of that little activity by a particular guy. He said he was single, so I talked to him in a way different than I would talk to a married/involved guy. Well, a year or so later, turns out he had a girlfriend the whole time. I got over it and still talked to him, but in the way I talk to married/involved guys. He kept talking to me in what I felt was an inappropriate way...not all the time, but he'd lapse.

Like when I thought I'd met someone really great, and he acted all hurt and told me he always thought I'd end up with him. (How can I end up with you?! You have a girlfriend and no interest in breaking up with her, not that I asked you to do that, but shut up with your f'ing mindgames and let me be happy, a'hole.)

Anyway, eventually you get sick of the mindgames and move on with life. But boys like to resurface now and then...like when they hear songs on the radio that remind them of you. Then they have to let you know about it. So you can have more mindgame fun when you hear it on the radio and almost start crying before thinking to yourself, "He's a manipulative a'hole you dropped almost two years ago and why are you thinking about crying over that mess of a human being?!"

So boys suck. Even the older ones.

Not just for the mindgames, but for making you associate songs with them. Can't hear it without the trip down memory lane. Melissa Etheridge's "The Only One" is still tied to someone I would have forgotten otherwise. But he bought the CD for me, and pops up in my memory for at least a moment every time I hear the song.

Humanities Students Screwed

So most of my classes tend to be held in old buildings that house the old departments. One of them has been recently refurbished, but it's still an old building. Basically, what I'm trying to say is, the air conditioning sucks in those buildings.

I do occasionally get assigned a class in the Business building...comfortable air conditioning there, as the building is pretty new. They built it when I first came here. It's comfortable. You get the feeling the settings are higher than ideal to cut energy costs, but it's livable.

Today I had a class in the Engineering building, and apparently most of the normal inhabitants are penguins. Freezing. Makes me wonder...because that building isn't exactly new, although the part I was in might be. But still, we all had to pay an extra $200 energy fee this semester, and as far as I can tell, most of that money is being spent by engineering.

Maybe the hippie departments are just down with open window cooling systems. And not having computer hookups at every seat plus wireless throughout the building. We're sweaty and unable to access the university's wireless computer network in our buildings, while the geeks are ice cold and able to check their e-mail whenever they want. Damned engineers.

Trey Parker is My Teacher

Today in forensics, we talked about Alferd Packer, and there's only one reason I know who that is and why we'd be discussing him in forensics.

Of course, my previous anthropology courses are why I knew a forensic anthropologist would study Packer's companions to look for cut marks on skeletal remains...and when I mentioned cut marks, I got a lot of blank looks from my discussion group. There aren't any prerequisites to the course, and I think anyone who hasn't already had some study of biological anthropology will have a hard time following some of the material.

Post-cranial remains, for example, are basically the remains sans the skull. It's a term you hear a lot in these courses, and several people didn't know what it meant. And if you're an art or business major, why would you?

Anyway, good day in classes today...knew all my Latin questions in class, good discussions in the others. I feel so smert. Give it a couple weeks, though...

Ample Notice

Yeah. So, I'm looking at my course load and wondering what the hell I was thinking. I'm taking two sciencey courses (one is nearly medical science), LATIN, an upper level history, and something that will be more reading than I expected.

This semester might kill me. That which does not kill me only kills my GPA. Not that I really think it's that dire. I tend to rise to the challenge and all that...but this semester will suck a little. Interesting courses, heavy workload.

I may have to drop badminton, though. I'll decide in the coming month. It doesn't start until October, and it is 3 hours a week when I could be reading about the decay of soft tissues in human corpses.

(Good that sort of thing interests me, eh?)

Deadly Directors

I can't seem to locate an actual paper copy of Cracked, so I've been spending time with the online version and finding some giggles and walks down memory lane.

The First Day of School

I lept a couple months ahead of all the other girls and rocked the hat and ponytail today. See, everybody (particularly freshmen) does their hair and makeup for the first week...then a few ponytails start appearing now and then...by midterms all you see are ponytails...and then by finals all you see are baseball caps with the ponytail and a complete lack of makeup. So I just cut right to the personal appearance laziness, hair-wise. Who am I trying to impress? (I never go without makeup, it might scare the children.)

Got home from my classes, and my sweet, sweet financial aid check was in the mailbox. Which means I got to buy all my books and am now plotting other uses for my sweet, sweet financial aid money. Like I probably need a handheld computer. And a new digital camera.

But I'll probably just keep it for bills because I'm boring like that.

Unless I see a really good deal on a camera.

Or handheld.

But it'd be hard to justify the camera as a school expense.

So just a handheld.

And probably not even that...it sounds complicated, picking one out and stuff.

Bleh. Bills it is.

Greetings

Was out of town for the week, and returned yesterday just in time to participate in Hell Day at work. Not only are all the parents in town (classes start tomorrow), but we also had a to-do at the stadium, which brought fans into town. So yesterday sucked beyond all reason.

Today sucked much less, but I had some freshman girl freak out on me because I didn't know if the one student planner we sell is "the one everyone will have this year". I told her the bookstore sells other kinds, and I don't know which is the best seller. (I suspect it is not the one we have, because that one is kind of sports-centric.) So she is a little stressed about following the herd. Hence the post below.

I am always amazed by people (young and old) who make their purchasing decisions based on which item is the best seller, or most popular with everybody else. Who gives a rip? Which one looks best on you? Which one will you wear more often? Which one fits your personality?

Picking a planner just because hordes of other retarded freshmen are buying it is completely stupid. Half of you will be on academic probation in 4 months. Find your own way.
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Speaking of academic probation, I know someone who was actually booted for low academic performance. Apparently you get one semester to bring yourself out of it. And then you go to community college and delude yourself into thinking someday you'll still be accepted into the Pharmacy program. I think if you can't pass the undergrad science, you may want to consider other fields. An "F" in Chemistry isn't great on the transcript, but you can try the second-grade option to bring it up and then move on to other things. Like English. Or something else Liberal Artsy. Such as, say, History. Even George W. Bush managed to get a History degree. At Yale.

Just throwing that out there.

Baa-aa

Attention incoming freshmen: no one gives a shit if you have the same exact planner as everyone else. Except maybe other incoming freshmen, and who cares what they think, anyway? A planner is not a thing that needs to be trendy. It just needs to work for you.

Fricking sheep.

How Could I Live Otherwise?

Clearly, I must have one of these.

So, have I mentioned my birthday is coming up?

Twitch, Twitch

This just in: terrorists suck.

Okay, now that we got that out of the way...
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Spent 3 hours this morning getting my v'icle serviced. New tires, oil change, and whatnot. Three hours. One People magazine. You do the math.

My only consolation as I was fidgeting in the waiting room was that I would probably get done in time to hit the bookstore before work. And I did.

But none of my damned books are in. So it's not just a matter of not being in the system. They're just not around. If they are all ordered at the off-campus bookstore, I'll be extra pissed.

See, we have the U's bookstore, which we can charge to our student ID and put off paying until the sweet, sweet financial aid money comes in.

Then we have the non-U bookstore, which actually makes us pay for our books.

And I just spent $400 on my car.

Once again, you do the math.

Feh.

Slave Wages vs. Resume Plumper

A student job has magically appeared that is actually in my field of study. Of course, it pays next to nothing, and my hours would be limited because it's not available weekends. I could work about 12 hours a week if I got it.

Meanwhile, I am going to be promoted at my current student job and making a reasonably decent wage for a student job. And I can work up to 20 hours a week. Including weekends. Which means I have to work weekends. In a job that is useless on my resume.

So...more than twice the money now or an improved shot at more money in the future?

In theory, I could still work my current job on weekends, but it'd mean I have to decline the promotion. And not only be a big fat traitor, but a big fat traitor who hangs around occasionally.

Yeah, I think I have to at least apply. I'll need to work up a budget to see if it's doable, but yeah.

So Wrong

So so wrong.

I pity the archaeologists of the future.

Abstinence

I hereby declare I will not have sex for the next year.

Unless Ewan McGregor becomes available.

Or Vince Vaughn.

Or Mike Piazza.

Or Ray Liotta.

Or Richie Sambora.

Or Matt Stone.

Or Gerard Butler.

Or LL Cool J.

Or Jason Mewes.

Or Ralph Fiennes.

Or Josh Hartnett.

Or Dave Navarro.

Or Troy Aikman.

Or that cute history grad student I met but didn't pay much attention to at the time because I had a boyfriend.

Or Angelina Jolie.

Or Dale Earnhardt, Jr.

Or Cuba Gooding, Jr.

Or Captain Jack Sparrow.

Or Danny Masterson.

This list is probably incomplete and will change over the next 365 days as my whims vary.

Two Weeks

Classes start August 21, and I have a busy two weeks ahead of me. Next week is busy because of work. Week after next, I'll be out of town. So you have that to look forward to.

I have yet to get most of my books, because the effing bookstore hasn't put up the book orders yet. So it looks like I'll be paying full price like a sucker.

I did manage to weasel my way into a full class early, which makes me happy because I need that class this semester. It means I had to drop a class that I was really interested in, but I should be able to take that one next year. American Revolutionary Theologies...blending U.S. history and religion, fun!

I'm also taking a gym class for the hell of it. Badminton. Heh. Can't believe they give you credit for that. And it's like a workout that you can't get out of going to, except it's not exactly the most grueling sport in the world. I remember taking that in high school gym, and I'd beat the wrestlers and football players when we were matched together. They'd get really pissed off about it, too. Heh. I probably suck now, but still. Should be a good time.
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Finally finished Madame Bovary. It was hard to get through, and not just because I tried to start it when I was on vacation and people wouldn't leave me in peace for more than 2 minutes. It was difficult because I had very little sympathy for her, I must say. "God, I have to read more about this selfish little whiner? I'll watch Jurassic Park instead."

I'm down with the outrage over women's lack of choices in that time period and all, but she made things worse for herself. Can't blame everything bad or boring that happens to you on circumstance, dearie. And I found the ending suspect. Berthe--or the suddenly-appearing-when-it-fit-the-story "aunt"-- didn't inherit anything from her grandparents? Whatever. Makes it more tragic and all, I suppose.

Bleh. Who wants my copy?

Competition

Okay, this post is only for the people who are showing up here by searching for Matt Stone's wife or if Matt Stone is married or if Trey Parker is married. The rest of you can skip it.

As far as I know as of this moment in time, Matt Stone is not married but is possibly still dating this woman. They were dating at least as early as the end of 2004...and photographed as recently as fall of 2005 that I know about. Could have been more recent that I don't know about.

Trey Parker got married in January this year to a lady named Emma Sugiyama. Pics here.

Carry on.

UPDATE 10/2/06: Matt Stone may be dating someone else. Pics and details here...along with more pics of Mrs. Parker.

Mm. Tea.

I love me some tea. Hot, cold, room temperature, whatever. I bought an iced tea brewer a few months back because I could never quite get a good pitcher of iced tea by brewing it myself.

However.

This morning I was out of iced tea and what the hell was I supposed to drink with my breakfast?! I looked over my wide array of tea bags, but really, it's too hot for hot tea. So I had an idea. I'd brew one mug of tea like normal, then pour it into a glass of ice.

It totally works. This will change my life. Instead of making a whole pitcher of one flavor of tea, I can have any flavor at any time I choose. This morning I had raspberry iced tea. Right now I'm having orange and spice iced tea.

I'm as happy as Cartman when he first bought his amusement park.

Google Fun

I've been seeing some searches for a certain someone showing up here in the last few days...and I am actually the first hit on Google for some of them.

I see I'm only 2nd here but it makes me proud. Behind Urban Dictionary but ahead of Wikipedia. Heh.